out of place

this afternoon, we had the swqc convention. being the assistant project leader daw in our group, i was invited, plus our project was one of the top 5 swqc presentors.

i felt guilty not having to include some of my groupmates, but i guess it was a right thing to do. when carlo asked me to give some additional persons, i was caught offguard on how to choose since sir dong and mam nene were not around. all my other groupmates are of the same level. thus, it would be unfair if im to choose one or two of them. and its also impossible to include all 16 of them :)

when i read the guest list, i was quite relieved to know that almost all the fools are invited. i guess its okay, i thought.

friday came, and after lunch, i was with anne and patty at the cr, i felt a little pathetic when i have to ask that we will be on the same bus. because, while waiting for 2pm, i tried asking korn, noel, and even mommy rhea if on what bus they are boarding since i wanna go with anyone of them. i dont wanna go to the bus alone. it feels really bad. i felt better knowing that me and noel agreed to go together. but when korn told me that they are going as a group, i felt out of place. nonetheless, i went to the bus with noel, until we arrived at marriot.

i was to go with noel, together in the table but sir dong asked me to be in the same table with them in the solutions group. i tried securing some table for us, but eventually it turned out that i went in the same table with edric and brian. not that they are not good aprilfools but they are with their own set of friends too. i felt so out of place..and i did not like it :(

brian and crammy were busy talking about world of war craft, edric and peter were busy talking with other things, or going smoking, while i waas busy texting and playing snake.

break time and dinner time came and i just went to the buffet table trying to fit in on any group :(

i dont like the feeling, i dont like seeing all my friends or batch so happy and enjoying while i was all alone...i felt like i not longer have any friends...okay, i am not being selfish. what i meant with i did not like what i saw is i feel like, im the only one who doesnt fit in with my groupmates and my supposed to be batchmates are no longer there for me.

i know, i know..i have to get use to it...i have to try..