so how?

1 year here in my company...

i never really expected that i will be able to work here that long...

i learned to be more mature. my officemate were of different nationalities, different languages, different age(i got no batchmate here and all are older than me) and different educational attainment(phd, masters and of course a degree).

i learned to be more independent. despite the fact that i have been living away from my family when i was in cebu, being in a different country is far more different. i even manage to go to the airport alone and travel to sg for the first time.

i learned how it is to go through interviews and exams once again. my previous company in cebu was the first one where i had an interview during college. that time i was not really taking it very seriously like i'd prepare a lot of things just to pass it. but my experience here is very stressful. waiting for calls from agents and companies, desperately learning everything just to pass the interview and get a job. that time, i was desperately trying to get a job. i am my family's source of income and i cannot stand not having a steady income.

i learned to be strong and sacrifice. as in real sacrifice.

i learned more of shell scripting. i was working in unix/linux environment mostly when i am in cebu, but i never touched it. i merely code and use the existing makefile whatsoever. i still prefer gui, but trust me, once you know scripting, you'll love it.

i learned that i love to be surrounded by friends, but i can be alone if i don't have them. i thought going here in sg would be fun coz most of the aprilfools are here, but then i realized all are having their own lives. i am lucky that we got internet and i was able to connect to two aprilfools whom i can easily bug when i need someone to talk to. i appreciate the cheap international call to philippines as well as i can talk to my friends and my family often.

i learned to be mature most specially. or maybe it goes with age =p but i was happy that i was able to prioritize my unnecessary wants to a more significant wants. sg has a lot of gadgets and sale. given the money, anything is almost accessible here. but of course, despite the fact that i wanted a mac or the very thin vaio or an slr so much, i learned to control and focused on something more important which is my family.

i learned to bake here. and it's something that i really enjoy. it's a therapy really. any food here is readily available. but of course the taste differs. that's why i was really happy that i can now afford even the cheap oven and some cheap baking stuffs.

i learned that i love thai. its sweet and spicy. i love sweet foods. ilonggo adobo is the best for me. thai, japanese, indonesian, indian foods are available in sg for a cheap price. even cheaper than mcdo and kfc. the variety of food is heaven for me as i love to try anything. so now everyone knows why i gained lots of pounds =p

i learned to eat spicy food or eat with chili party. it's like a soy sauce with lots of sliced chilies. i like eating fish soup with it, and i love my chicken rice with dark soy sauce mixed with a little chili.

i learned that i can never go tired of eating chicken. i had 4 days of kfc for dinner once. i love to cook lechon manok at home.

i learned to love coffee. the strong one with milk.

i learned that even if i do not show it, i love my family so much. despite the difficulties, i still cannot stand my siblings. even if what i am doing was wrong tolerating them, i still cannot leave them behind and not help them. first time i felt homesick. a few days before and after my birthday i cried for consecutive nights because i miss them. i cried really hard when i got a card from nanay and read their message to me. birthday is a big deal for me. i wanted to make everyone feel happy on their birthdays which is why i was trying to give surprises or buy them cakes or greet at midnight because i thought it's nice to feel loved. i wanted the same way on my birthday. but i also learned i can let it go if i dont get treated the same way i do.

i am thankful that i went here. i was able to go to uk because of my job.
i am thankful that soi and i are not in long distance relationship. we see each other everyday.
i am thankful that i get along well with soi's brother.
and i am really thankful that i was able to help my family. one thing that i am really happy of is i was able to give my parents a general check up and we can now sustain their medicines.

life here was not easy. sometimes i feel homesick and depress. i don't know if it's just because of the circumstances or it is really the place that i feel depress. i never felt depress in cebu. now i can understand why a lot of people here commit suicide. sometimes it is just so boring.

despite the fact that i earn more here, it's the first time i felt so poor. i spent so much on my trip home last december.

soi even tolerated me. i spent most of my salary preparing for gifts. soi spent all his money to buy gifts for my family as well and even gave me money to spend home. come Christmas, then new year, then my birthday and i dont have enough money. it was heartbreaking withdrawing some of my savings just to buy some things for the new year and for my birthday. i canceled my planned kiddie party for my birthday and and opted for a simpler dinner.

my experience here was really life changing. it made me close to my family, to our youngest sister, to soi and to his brother. i learned to dream bigger. it was not easy living here. financially it was actually more difficult. it's just that we never forget to enjoy thru good food or good movie or some gadget buys. the whole year soi and i was like huffing. hurrying the days that our financial obligations will be over but i guess it does not end that soon.

expenses here in sg are quite high. the rent itself is a major deductions to our payroll. we sometimes slip from the budget with some impulsive buys but i guess that made our stay here sane. if not, we would probably be overstressed by the expenses back home and expenses here in sg.

my security on staying here in sg is still not sure. i still got the job, but my stay here still depends on their government of course. i tried my very best to get that security but i was not granted the favor. i just hope i can stay here longer.

this place might not like be cebu where i felt at home, but for now i dont want to leave either.